Before falling a sleep

Times is changing,
My thoughts are rearranging
memories are old stains
Sometimes I can be scrambled, but must hold on to the handle &
head forward , can't live to have another day taken,
Don't wanna be forsaken
Asleep in the middle of night shaking
Awakening....taking in
...feel myself breath
I see the darkness,
In the corner hear light music play,
Melody of nirvana's "Polly "
Before I go back to sleep again
Pray to calm me, and ease me back to sleep softly
But I can't sleep, I'm awake with thoughts
What is of tomorrow?..from Gods plot?
& also an errand I have to do...but
I forgot
I know I have to get a battery for my watch,
And I voted already, Obama came on top.
Hopefully what he says wasn't all talk,
But actually walking the talk,
Know what I mean?
While fortunes are being build on peoples broken dreams
just because its unseen
Does not mean its not happening....cause it is
We need parental advisory ..we're we live,
Not just for Tipper Gore's kids
where they don't have to fear sh*t, or be alone
Rap Music they tried to "silence" because it infiltrated their home to their sons headphone.
And I hope their is a "change" or "move forward," whatever campaign logo they wanna relate, this term in debate
Thinking our minds are in sedate, but my eyes are dilate
Looking to scheme, you wanna shape
But the truth is
the soldiers where taken out of Iraq, but in Afghanistan they
relocate
Why? Is it really for peace ?
Our ways, to them we wanna teach??
Because we're so right and were so good??
Just outside my neighbourhood,
I see people digging in trash for food,
Depending on drugs to stabilise their mood
Their conscious is helpless
& I bet they feel misunderstood.
Money is out to war, but can't feed the poor...
Life is what you make it...
I guess.
write to keep from being depress, ...God Bless..
This place of mess.
Live for my kids..yes 

jean michel basquiat

( Basquiat is seen walking) 
Background music of a jazz beat 
Is playing in the mind 
Walking alone in the streets 
almost like searching 
with nothing to find 
During time 
of the seventies and eighties. 
Living from scraps, many times food off a trashcan 
Downtime.. 
tagging on the walls with one spray can 
written by hand 
variety of messages that still stands: like
"SAMO is Dead" , "Life is confusing at this Point" and
"SAMO@ AS AN ALTERNATIVE TO PLASTIC FOOD STANDS" 
Art was going through a social change,

It needed to change 

Because it was all looking & even sounding the same 

you came in, and changed the game, 

disproportioned its waist,

with Warhol and Harring, 

gave it a new face, 

gave the observer a new "taste"

and sound...starting with " Gray "

 the name of your band, 

eccentric, electric and original 
Unlike others that were just typical, 
In the middle of the punk and art scene 
We're smoking weed is habitual, before they made it medicinal 
Yet opiates helped you reached your untimely end, 
Overdosed after shooting heroin 
Eyes rolled back, taking last breath 
Not a surprise, everyone in the room left 
Around you there was no friend 
Maybe you needed a heroine, a woman to tame thee, 
for the while, 
just to living wild 
the ecclectic radiant genious child 
your artwork is an inspiration, 
But nothing mattered... 
till you made it 
Now people try to take it, 
( your old art from the street, for easily over $300,000 a piece) 
fame, you really couldn't take it 
with your art, tried to escape it 
but alas you couldn't shake it 
so overdosed and died, that was close to twenty-five.... 
Years ago 
Worldwide, your artwork is exhibited in shows 
Sometimes in private auctions sold, 
for prices untold 
a price I may never afford 
But if you ask me, 
that isn't the real glory 
but your art via eyes... 
that tell...your life story 

Disdain

Fuck what I've been through 
nobody knows my sorrows or pain, 
I don't display 
so I keep it all locked inside my brain, 
because it keeps me sane 
In Disdain, 
hard to make me feel ashamed 
I chill in the shade 
Were others want to see light, 
f*k the light 
In the darkness I see what's bright 
Close my eyes to see in vivid eyesight 
20/15 , 
I hate how tonight makes me feel, 
Almost like I wanna kill 
blood spill 
I guess I might need help 
f*k everyone, decayed is my health 
I'm a die in low wealth 
Why have someone, when you end up dying by yourself? 
put my game face 
Because, these are the cards I've been delt 

You still have today (for the Sandy Hook children)

Wake up...wake Up! 
inhale at today, for today may not be the same 
Were living through the sands of time..there is only time 
If you search, you dont always find. 
or even make it out alive 
but no one is awake, 
So YOU must for alls sake! 
happiness is a touch away, 
A sight, a kiss, making something out of sh*t 
or these words I write as I sit, 
I don't wanna miss..this 
or forget, write wihout Edit 
and just have my mind "vent" 
invent, forget about bills or the money you spent 
All that will die , like melted snow 
I want you to smile like you just made love 5 minutes ago 
I sit in my chair, to say I care 
if no one else cares 
Theese days are soo tragic 
it's like were kids again, waiting on magic 
something to make us all happy again 
like shoulder to lie on, like a friend 
from all this destruction 
madness and recent sadness 
f*ck*d up..., but im not giving up.. 
Im living..., Living 
Living for the Sandy Hook children 
taken away so sudden 
All for nothing 
but rage 
bless their families in this forever moment in pain 
But smile for them, because... 
You still have today... 

Relationship, is but a painted hell 10/11/2012

It never fails, being yourself fails, just be yourself is b*llsh*t,
the realism is that it changes when it comes to relationship.
If you don't believe me you'll fall culprit
A friend can accept you, but your love will want to change you
To thoughts of their ideals
Not knowing their ideal is not real,
But you try because you care of what they feel
But leaves you unreal
Dismay is displayed and played on how you both now feel
Mornings have lost their warm spirit
Now I shed a tear, when I shave at the mirror,
Because I miss ...
The sweet morning kiss, the soft touch of her lip
She's there , but
"Not really there " anymore
While I forever love her..
It seems..it seems...
Like now I annoy her...
Love has an expiration date it seems
Temporary, is only to how one feels,
Don't fall victim to its kill.. 

I don't believe in love anymore (2010)

I dont believe in love anymore for a queen to be with me. 
 I only live and have love for my seed, I praise her as the most precious being. 
She's my little queen, and daddy's her king,
no one can come in and change that. 
though I know later in age she will be released to experience life, 
and possibly be someones wife.  
Till then and after I will be her Rock, Daddy will never let her down. 
grab her hand and walk her on the ocean shore, 
and let her know everything will be alright, 
passed every dark night will be morning to sunlight. 
An it shines for her to reach, it shines for me to teach, 
and enjoy the simple things like crackling sounds of leaves through the breeze.
Women have only brought pain and headache, 
sex is temporary pleasure, after it, I only receive bad tempers, why didn't I know better?  
Maybe I choose insecure members? 
I've dated many types, none are alike yet im never happy. 
when u think U found one, U need to test it, otherwise, years later you'll regret it,
I love the female specimen but the female gives hell, can send u to jail. 
Use all your money and yet not consider themselves  "greedy" 
but what they receive they "deserve."  
U deserve to get your ass kicked, poured gasoline and lit, spit, fake as counterfeit, 
Bitch your tongue should fall off because u never really tell the truth, you embellish it.
Save that sh*t, 
U make a victim for people to feel sorry for, 
and cry when your man walks out the door.. 
because he couldn't stand U anymore,  
Beware to those misled, 
just because she gave u head and gave U a sandwich in bed, don't believe it, because you'll be disappointed when love is not what you receive it.... Silly you were deceived.  
I'll live , I'll live single...an happy 
Till I'm dead, they won't catch me 
And I say this laughingly 
Because sometimes it's a part of life that some men have to see... 

Dedicated to those that see with closed eyes... 
****Realize 

Soo Far my opinion between Obama vs Romney

I gotta finish watching the debates, i fell asleep, but I'm on the fence. 

not knowing yet. I was Obama in 08, because to me he seemed like the Go to guy vs Bush,and he HAD good plans . 

I like Obamacare because it will open thousands of community center nation wide for primary care, which will in turn save $$$ because "hopefully , and I'm hoping" people won't come to the ER for bulkshit and get million dollar workups , when it could have cost less than $30.00. 

I don't care for  him acting "celebrity" and having luncheons with Jayz and

Kardashians like they know what the fuck is up ! 

Your a president act like President !

And Im tired of the Obama shirts (side note) lol

Romney is making sense soo far, but don't like the PBS thing (who with a heart wants to take Sesame Street away??), and him sugar coating what a small business is. To him D.Trump is considered in the small business category. 

how will that help the hard

(no Ins, barely enough $$ for bills, cutting hours job, or indepebdent REAL small business) working man and woman ??

Either way , I think they're both puppets to the puppeteer.